Time Boundaries + Insights on Healing & Relationships

In this video, I’m offering an alternate way to conceptualize when people don’t text you back immediately… so you can get free sis … come up higher. #becauseboundaries

Let’s chop it up about an essential topic on anyone’s healing journey: time boundaries.

Setting Boundaries with Time:
Recently, I posted a meme on social media that seemed harmless, but it triggered a few people. The meme was about the delayed response to messages, and some individuals expressed how it bothered them. They believed delayed responses meant they weren’t a priority to the person they messaged. I want to offer a different way to conceptualize this experience.

Here’s the meme btw:

As adults on healing journeys, it’s crucial to understand that someone not responding immediately doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t value you emotionally or socially. It may indicate that they don’t have you as a high priority in terms of time. Time is finite, and we all have different responsibilities and obligations.

For instance, as a special needs mother taking care of my son’s medical needs, my time is limited. While I may deeply love you and value you emotionally, I might not have you as a top time priority because my son’s care requires a significant portion of my time. It’s important to recognize that time prioritization does not reflect your worth or their feelings toward you.

Having unrealistic expectations of people’s time can lead to disappointment and frustration. You might find yourself constantly jumping to respond to others’ messages while not receiving the same level of attention in return. It’s crucial to remember that you don’t have to prioritize everyone at the same level or above yourself.

Everyone has agency over their time. If someone takes a week to respond to a text because they were scrolling through TikTok, they prioritized their relaxation over responding to you. And that’s perfectly fine. We all need downtime, and sometimes we have to prioritize ourselves. It’s about finding a balance and respecting each other’s boundaries.

When you realize you are not someone’s top priority, you have options. You can choose to stop talking to them if that’s what you prefer. Alternatively, you can adjust your expectations and acknowledge their lower level of prioritization. It’s also possible to maintain the existing relationship as it is while recognizing the disparity in priority levels. Lastly, you can communicate your desire for a deeper connection and express your needs to foster understanding.

I believe setting and honoring time boundaries is a core part of maturing and personal growth, and healing. It allows us to prioritize ourselves, respect others’ boundaries, and build healthier relationships. Remember, not everyone can be your top priority, and that’s okay. Embrace the agency you have over your time and make conscious choices about how you allocate it.

I hope this prompts you to reflect on your own time boundaries and relationships. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments section below. If you’re a Black woman on a healing journey, consider joining my “Find Your Light” coaching community on Facebook.